I Call The Big One Bitey

"I call the big one Bitey." -- Homer Simpson, "Marge Vs. The Monorail"

We've had quite a few mishaps and misadventures, our little gang of cyclists, over the years.

We've fallen backwards into the Vltava; ridden into a deep hole, falling ass over tit; surprised horseback riders on the trail, causing one rider to fall off a bucking horse; turned our hand into a bloody mess, courtesy of a Swiss Army knife; had potatoes thrown at us; been run off the road and pinned up against a hedge by insane Czech drivers; fell on the ice; discovered caves and Egyptian follies and long-lost sculpture gardens and secret lakes.

I thought we'd pretty much experienced it all. Until yesterday.

That's when I was bitten by a ferret.

I had stopped at the beer garden in Divoká Šárka for a bit of refreshment while on a short ride from my new flat in Prague 6. A couple walked into the beer garden with two ferrets, each on a leash. I asked them if I could take a photo. They said yes. I took a photo.

When I reached out my hand to pet the little critters, one of them sunk his teeth right into the flesh beween my thumb and forefinger.

The wife had to use her fingers to pry the ferret's jaws open. The sumbitch just wouldn't let go.

If she told me not to pet them, I didn't hear her. She did have a first-aid kit at the ready and whipped out a little antiseptic towel for me to rub on the wound. I'm guessing such incidents are not uncommon when it comes to her ferrets.

I tried to laugh it off. It only started bleeding profusely once I was back on my bike and on the trail again.

My own damn fault, I guess.

But let me just ask: What the hell kind of a pet is that?!

Ironically, my cycling gloves (which I always wear) would probably have saved me, if I hadn't forgotten them for some odd reason.

Anyway, the route around Divoká Šárka and the village of Nebušice is perfect for a little one-hour exercise ride. I was having a bit more trouble than usual breathing, what with my asthma acting up, and so, despite the perfect conditions, I couldn't wait for the ride to be over.

That's what I get for wanting to get a little exercise.

Length of ride: 14 kilometers
Average speed: 14.7 kph
Maximum speed: 52.5 kph
Pivo Index: 1
Time on the bike: 0.56.33
Distance ridden so far in 2012: 107 kilometers


JackFate said…
Max speed 52kph! Was that when you were fleeing from the ferret?
Grant Podelco said…
Heading downhill at full speed from the International School to Jeneralka. That's quite a hill. Funny thing is, I also forgot to wear my helmet that day!

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